I'm From Driftwood
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I'm From Selingsgrove, PA by William Bennage
When I was a young boy my mom died and I did not have a very pleasant childhood. Shortly after that the man I used to believe is my father ended up moving away. Sad times for me. Then I had to move into a house with the man who claimed to my biological father and life was not easy living there. One day he caught me shaving my legs and he said he was going to tell everyone that I was gay. Then I realized I was different.
I had pressures to date the opposite sex at least until I was 21 years of age. Being so depressed from knowing I was different, I tried to end my life. After two attempts I realized that it was not worth losing my life. I had struggled with coming out to my sisters and other family members. This was hard for me to do. I sat my one sister down and asked her not to hate me and I cried. She asked me, “Why would I hate you ?” I told her I was gay and she said she was disappointed but she didn’t hate me. I then told my other sisters. Some did not take it so well, others made jokes about it. I then came out to my ex-girlfriend’s parents who I loved as my own parents. I cried and told them I was gay and there was silence in the room but I knew I had to tell them. After that life changed for me. I tried to get dates, lots of times unsuccessfully. I did not fit in with either the gay or straight community at first. After years of failed relationships and being alone I vowed just to be myself.
I now have found this wonderful older man that has been in my life for over three years and hopefully will be for more. We had a commitment ceremony last year and did not realize how many people were at odds with two people of the same sex having this type of ceremony. Some people showed but sadly no family came to see the lovely event. The reception was filled with tears as we danced. I gave a speech to him in the form of a toast, kind of like my vows to him. It was definitely a night to remember. After that we continue today to live as husband and husband facing the world together as a couple and staying strong about our future together.
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“I’m From Watford City, ND”
Story by Kelley Halvorson; Artwork by featured artist, Brian Ness
*Be on the lookout for work by an IFD featured artist every Sunday!
It was 1976, the year I won a Soprano spot in the North Dakota State Honors Choir. A small-town gal, I was thrilled to hang out with other music geeks for 3 days. The festival was fabulous — I learned to sing gospel music for the first time, and to improvise. I met so many great people that I found I didn’t even miss my sweet boyfriend, whom I left back home.
But what really mattered — what really, really mattered — was that every day, for about 8 hours, I was able to stand directly across from you — this gorgeous brunette in the Alto section — about 6 feet tall, and your legs were about 5 feet of it.
In 1976, girls didn’t have visible muscles, but you had actual muscle definition in her shoulders and arms! I asked a fellow soprano who you were — she said you were a gifted athlete from Dickinson. Rumor has it, she said, that you were a lesbian! I couldn’t stop staring–you often looked back. I blushed several times a day, lost track of the song measures and conductor’s direction. And looked again, heart pounding.
No, I never talked to you. I enjoyed you every day, felt tingling in all my 16-year-old private places, fantasized — then went home to my boyfriend. I forgot your name.
But I never forgot how I felt. I came out 2 years later. I thank you so much for my awakening. And gospel music still makes my heart pound, thirty years later.
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Luke Harlan, “I’m From Fayetteville, AR”
After enduring ex-gay counseling and his Southern Baptist roots, Luke finally finds happiness by being true to himself.
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I'm From Claremont, NH by Jordan FD
My name is Jordan, I’m from New Hampshire, and I’m transgender. When I was growing up I knew I wasn’t like the rest of the girls. I always wanted to play with boys, and do boy-like things. I always dressed like a boy like I do now. We always figured I was just a tomboy, because we never knew of the term transgender. I used to play house with my friend Josh and I would always be a boy. He was always the father, I was always the brother. If I couldn’t play a boy I wouldn’t play at all. As I grew older I tried to make myself more feminine for fear I would be picked on, but that just wasn’t me so I went back to making myself more masculine. If people picked on me, I would ignore them the best I could.
I was browsing around on YouTube and I came to something about transgender people. I watched it in awe and at the end I realized, wow, that’s exactly what I feel, what I am. I told my mom how I felt and said I wanted a boy’s haircut. She said sure and we went to go get me a surfer’s haircut. As the days went on, I talked to her more and more about how I felt, and I finally broke the news to her: I was transgender. She wasn’t shocked but she didn’t really believe me either. She accepts me but she doesn’t understand me fully. I tell myself that you can’t really fully understand a transgender person unless you are a transgender person. I told my dad I was transgender, and he didn’t have the reaction I hoped for. I was hoping he would tell his girlfriend, but when he picked me up that night, he told me he wanted to keep it a secret and that it was too personal to share. I got really upset and didn’t know what to say. I really couldn’t believe he was trying to hide who I really am. I thought he would be totally cool with it because my dad’s girlfriend’s son is gay, and my sister is bisexual so he has experience with it. I am glad my mom accepted me. The other stories on here have inspired me so much. I hope my story has inspired you too.
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Alan Cumming, “I’m From Carnoustie, Scotland, UK
Alan Cumming remembers when he first felt an attraction to guys and how he came out to American media in a big way. (Video transcription available here)
Alan’s story was collected on the 50-state Story Tour.
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